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OFF TOPIC => Off Topic => Topic started by: sleeperred90tgp on March 16, 2008, 04:57:29 PM

Title: walmart, They have everything.
Post by: sleeperred90tgp on March 16, 2008, 04:57:29 PM
One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe says to Mike behind him, "My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I'd better see a doctor."

"Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies.

"There's a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart. Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it.

It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars . . . A lot cheaper than a doctor."

So, Joe deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Wal-Mart.

He deposits ten dollars and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits.

Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout:

"You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks. Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart."

That evening, while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Joe began wondering if the computer could be fooled.

He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and a sperm sample for good measure.

Joe hurries back to Wal-Mart, eager to check the results. He deposits ten dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results.

The computer prints the following:

1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. (Aisle 9)
2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle 7)
3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.
4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.
5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better!

Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart
Title: Re: walmart, They have everything.
Post by: TGP Nick on March 16, 2008, 06:00:00 PM
 :bonk:
Title: Re: walmart, They have everything.
Post by: TGPvsTIII on March 17, 2008, 07:08:56 PM
was the print out in English or Chinese?
Tim
Title: Re: walmart, They have everything.
Post by: TGPvsTIII on April 01, 2008, 07:03:03 PM
walmart does have everything. except whats in this link. but don't worry they will spend more then they will get to get this. Walmart sucks
http://news.aol.com:80/story/_a/wal-mart-sues-disabled-ex-employee/20080329083609990001?ncid=NWS00010000000001
Tim
Title: Re: walmart, They have everything.
Post by: meltboy11 on April 01, 2008, 07:48:01 PM
ya, I can't think of anything at the moment that pisses me off more that this story... it's just sad
Title: Re: walmart, They have everything.
Post by: jimmy on April 01, 2008, 07:54:27 PM
    hey what do you know.........Walmart still the lowest  :ugone2far: