> The 1st Affair
> A married man was having an affair with his secretary.
>
> One day they went to her place and made love all afternoon.
>
> Exhausted, they fell asleep and woke up at 8 PM. The man hurriedly
> dressed
> and told his lover to take his shoes outside and rub them in the grass
> and
> dirt.
>
> He put on his shoes and drove home.
>
> "Where have you been?" his wife demanded.
>
> "I can't lie to you," he replied,
>
> "I'm having an affair with my secretary.
>
> We had sex all afternoon."
>
> She looked down at his shoes and said:
>
> "You lying bastard! You've been playing golf!"
>
> The 2nd Affair
>
> A middle-aged couple had two beautiful daughters but always talked about
> having a son. They decided to try one last time; for the son they always
> wanted. The wife got pregnant and delivered a healthy baby boy.
>
> The joyful father rushed to the nursery to see his new son.
>
> He was horrified at the ugliest child he had ever seen.
>
> He told his wife: "There's no way I can be the father of this baby.
>
> Look at the two beautiful daughters I fathered!
>
> Have you been fooling around behind my back?"
>
> The wife smiled sweetly and replied:
>
> "Not this time!"
>
> The 3rd Affair
>
> A mortician was working late one night.
>
> He examined the body of Mr. Schwartz, about to be cremated, and made a
> startling discovery.
>
> Schwartz had the largest private part he had ever seen!
>
> "I'm sorry Mr. Schwartz," the mortician
>
> commented, "I can't allow you to be cremated with such an impressive
> private
> part.
>
> It must be saved for posterity."
>
> So, he removed it, stuffed it into his briefcase, and took it home.
>
> "I have something to show you, that you won't believe," he said to his
> wife,
> opening his briefcase.
>
> "My God!" the wife exclaimed, "Schwartz is dead!"
>
> The 4th Affair
>
> A man walked into a cafe, went to the bar and ordered a beer.
>
> "Certainly, Sir , that'll be one cent."
>
> "One Cent?" the man exclaimed.
>
> He glanced at the menu and asked:
>
> "How much for a nice juicy steak & and a bottle of wine?"
>
> "A nickel," the barman replied.
>
> "A nickel?" exclaimed the man.
>
> "Where's the guy who owns this place?"
>
> The bartender replied:
>
> "Upstairs, with my wife."
>
> The man asked: "What's he doing upstairs with your wife?"
>
> The bartender replied:
>
> "The same thing I'm doing to his business down here."
>
> The 5th Affair
>
> Josef was dying.
>
> His wife sat at the bedside.
>
> He looked up and said weakly:
>
> "I have something I must confess."
>
> "There's no need to," his wife replied. "No," he insisted, "I want to
> die in
> peace. I slept with your sister, your best friend, her best friend, and
> your
> mother!"
>
> "I know," she replied, "now just rest and let the poison work."
>

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I've seen those before, but that's freakin awesome!

Hey Jud, I think You posted that before...

http://www.tgpforums.com/index.php?topic=3919.0

:laugh:

HAHAHA

Quote from: Dark Ride on May 07, 2007, 12:51:29 PM
Hey Jud, I think You posted that before...

http://www.tgpforums.com/index.php?topic=3919.0

:laugh:

That could be, memory ain't like it used to be. :icon_redface: :laugh:

Just want all you guys to laugh again :icon_biggrin:

Um what month is this :icon_question:

Quote from: sleeperred90tgp on May 07, 2007, 03:17:54 PM

Quote from: Dark Ride on May 07, 2007, 12:51:29 PM
Hey Jud, I think You posted that before...

http://www.tgpforums.com/index.php?topic=3919.0

:laugh:

That could be, memory ain't like it used to be. :icon_redface: :laugh:

Just want all you guys to laugh again :icon_biggrin:

Um what month is this :icon_question:

Thats what happens when you have been sniffing those turbo fumes to long :)